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You don't have to wait for Valentine's Day to give your partner a massage. It's a great idea, costs nothing, and increases intimacy between you--but how do you get started? I'm here to tell you how it's done. Begin by setting the mood: Candles, scents, and soft music. Then eliminate distractions. That means: feed the pets and turn the answering machine on, etc. Once you have your Enya CD playing and your lavender candles burning, have your mate lie down on their back (floor, sofa, or bed). Don't forget to make yourself comfortable, too. Very often the people doing the massage don't think of their own comfort and you should enjoy this also. Start at the feet. Use a little bit of lotion or oil. The key word is little--you don't want to cause an oil slick! You can use a good quality lotion or massage oil. Gently start stroking the feet with your whole hand. If your partner is ticklish, work slowly and avoid working with your fingers. Instead use the palm of your hand. Work on one foot at a time. Observe your partner's face for reactions (discomfort, giggles, relaxation) and adjust your touch accordingly. Encourage your partner to give you some feedback ("that feels great" or "that's a little ticklish"). You can work all areas of the foot: the toes, heel, instep and sole. The heel and sole (if not squeamish) usually can take some strong pressure. Repeat with the other foot. After 10 minutes of massaging the feet, your partner will be somewhere between heaven and pure bliss. Now might be a good time to ask for that something special you always wanted (Oops! Wrong article). Ready for more? Move up to the hands. People are always surprised at how much tension is held within the small muscles of the hand. Use broad strokes with the palm of your hand to pull on your partner's hand (like milking). Start working on the wrist and continue working toward the tip of the fingers. The palm of the hand contains some very strong muscles and can take some pressure. Use small movements to work the fleshy portions of the palm: the base of the thumb and the center of the hand. Repeat with the other hand.
This sample routine can be as short as 15 minutes or as long as an hour. It's up to you. Bask in the gratitude from your partner and don't expect to receive your massage until the next day. Let them thoroughly experience the relaxation of your session. After the massage your partner might be ready to go to sleep or they might be feeling a little amorous (another added benefit). Enjoy.
Ed Lamadrid, licensed massage therapist has been helping people to relax since 1989. He works in New York City and teaches couple's massage. For more information, call 917-741-7419. All rights reserved. © Ed Lamadrid 2002 |
Couple's Massage !
By now your partner will be very relaxed and might even be sleeping.
Focus your attention on the head area. Most people don't like to have excessive use of oil or lotion on their face and hair, so adjust accordingly. The face contains many thin muscles that experience a
lifetime of smiling, frowning and many kinds of expressive actions. Simple strokes along the face can be very relaxing for the recipient as well as providing a great way to express your nurturing side. Use the outside
face of your hand (not your palm) to gently apply feathering strokes along the side of the face, and along the fore head. Make your way down to the ears. Use your fingers
and thumbs to gently outline the ears. Finish the massage by stroking your partner's forehead or hair.
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